You Get to Decide Who You Become
by Lindsey Turnbull
Can I be honest with you?
I don’t believe that who you are today determines who you will become. When you hear that over and over, you start to believe it.
Certainly, someone in your life has told you that every decision can affect your future and one “wrong” decision, one mistake, one “bad” choice can have disastrous consequences that will follow you forever. That’s a LOT of pressure to put on yourself.
If someone tells you this, tell that person “Thank you for your opinion.” Then, lean in cause I’m going to tell you the truth.
We make choices every day. We learn daily. Each day, each new person we meet, each new experience, presents us with opportunities that can change our tomorrow.
If you started off on one path and realized it’s not for you, it’s OK to change. You get to choose.
Change can bring up a lot of conflicting feelings!
As a teenager, I had a hot temper. I liked the idea of being a little bit intimidating. Anger was comfortable and easy. But it hurt me & my relationships with others. I made a choice to confront my anger & learn how to use it in healthy ways. I liked my reputation, but I didn’t want to carry my anger all the time. I didn’t want to be an angry adult, putting myself into an early grave from going zero to RAGE over everything.
I didn’t want to be controlled by my anger. It was hard challenging ingrained feelings and learning new emotions. I don’t get it perfect all the time (not by a long shot), but the relationship is much improved.
Change can also mean healing, freedom, and joy. Change can be exciting, especially when you make the choice, to make a choice.
You are allowed to change, to make mistakes, to grow, to get help, to heal, to evolve, to learn. It is not only OK, it is expected and encouraged (by me, at least)!
Your path is fluid and ever-changing, and most importantly, unique. You may end up somewhere different than you expected, and that place can be where you were meant to go.
Related Reading
Self-Discovery & Life Transitions, an interview with Claire W. and Jackie W.
It’s Never Too Late to Find Yourself by Belle Fabian
Finding Myself on El Camino by Alina Wilson
3 Steps for Listening to Yourself by Courtney Harris, Life Coach